Just a dream or was it?
by amazed with life
Summary: What would happen if Clare dreamt her whole relationship with Eli? From the very first day they met? Would she do things differently the second time around?
1. Chapter 1

aEli had just left for NYU. I was feeling sad. I mean, I'm not trying to be selfish...it's just there will be so many new faces, and interesting things to do. He probably doesn't want a stick in the mud girlfriend to be around ruining all his fun. He probably wants the full college experience. With the parties, and hooking up with random girls, and trying drugs (although he's already had that experience.) I was sitting in the hospital bed just thinking when my phone beeped meaning I had a message.

**Plane just took off and I already miss you like crazy.**

**-Eli-**

I didn't answer. I just sat there staring at the text.. then at the ceiling.. then at the walls.. then the doctor walked in.

"Clare..."

Then I opened my eyes. I sat up... must have just been a dream. I reached up and touched my fore head and was surprised to feel hair. HAIR!

_What the heck is going on?_

I thought to myself... then my mother yelled at me..

"Clare get up! You're gonna be late!"

"Okay!" then I got up and walked to my mirror. My hair was short. I looked like I did when I was fifteen. I still couldn't figure out what the heck was going on. I just shaved my head. I should be in the hospital. I am so confused. I walked down stairs.

"Hey mom, I talked to Eli last night and..."

"Wait Clare, who is Eli?"

"Mom. You know who Eli is. My boy friend."

"Oh. Good for you honey. I was beginning to worry the whole KC thing had taken a bad toll on you."

"Mom... I've been over KC for over a year now..."

"So you did not like him when you two dated... cause it's only been about six months."

"Mom... what are you talking about?"

"Oh never mind. We're gonna be late. Hurry!"

So I did. I ate then I caught the bus, and began thinking about what a weird and confusing this morning was turning out to be.

So I don't have any idea where this story is gonna go... but I hope yall like it. PLEASE REVIEW! Bye now.


	2. Chapter 2

I got off the bus and headed towards the building in search of Adam. I needed to tell him about my weird morning but I couldn't find him, and for about the thousandth time that day I wondered what the heck was going on. I began walking to the school building when Alli ran up to me

"Clare I got your text last night and no you are not going to start wearing your glasses again!"

"Alli. I don't know what your talking about. I haven't used my glassed in over a year."

"You were wearing them two days ago. They are in your bag right now."

"No they are not..." I never got to finish my sentence because I had opened my bag and there they were in all their glory. My glasses. I took them out of my bag and looked at them Alli grabbed them and on instinct I tried to get them back we started to fight and somehow the glasses ended up falling on the ground and I stepped forward to pick them up when I car drove over them. Morty! Eli stepped out although it wasn't exactly the Eli I knew now... this one was a sixteen year old Eli.. with his rings, combat boots, guyliner, and all.

"I think they're dead." I almost laughed. That was such an Eli thing to say I swear.

"Its ok. I got laser eye surgery."

"You have..."

"I think you have pretty eyes." I said and he looked shocked that I had said what he was going to say.

"Well I'll see you around." I continued and then I smirked and walked away.

"Uh oh. I know that look." I smirked again. I know what was going on. I know what's going to happen and what's going to be said... and I can change it. This line I chose not to change though.

"I have no idea what your talking about."

HAHAHA! I honestly wasn't expecting to get a good response out of this story... but hey... yall seem to like it... PLEASE REVIEW! Bye now.


	3. Chapter 3

I was in class waiting for Mrs. Dawes to come in the room. Today was the big day.. I was exited. I kept sending Eli looks, though he had no idea why. Gosh this was way more fun than it probably should be. Today was the day I got a "c" on and essay. Today was the day Eli became my English partner. Mrs. Dawes passed out the papers.

"Mrs. Dawes... a "c" really?"

We kind of argued for a minute and she said the thing about my vampire fiction and then she proclaimed me and Eli to be partners.. I smiled a little then Eli said

"Me?" sarcastically and I remembered why I snapped at him that day.

"We could have a very special partnership on our hands. Like Sylvia Plath and Ted Hughes."

"Sylvia Plath killed herself."

The class laughed and Eli shook his head a little and the bell rang. We were walking to the door and just like I knew it would happen he bumped into me and let himself out first. He smirked at me and shook his head before walking away. I saw Alli

"He's just so... ugh! You know?"

"I get it Clare you're in love with Eli. Now..."

I stopped listening and shook my head yes and thought "_yes. Yes I am."_

3RD CHAPTER! PLEASE REVIEW! Bye now.


	4. Chapter 4

It was the next day, I had written my essay. I had thought about writing the one I wrote after we skipped to impress Eli... but then I thought if I wrote the good one first we wouldn't skip class. So I wrote the original one and brought it to class. While Eli read I couldn't help but watch him... he was just so cute. I was a little jealous of that apple he was chewing on. I was smirking at the thought when he looked up.

"Is there anything good about it?"

"Uh.. the..."

"Besides the title being centered."

He looked shocked again and I smirked at him.

"How did you...?"

"I have to skip. I cant turn that piece of crap in."

This time Eli smirked.

"You could always..."

"Take off. Yeah I know."

"Okay. How do you know what I'm going to say before I say it?"

I played dumb. "What are you talking about?"

"Uh... never mind."

I got up and started walking to the door then when I got there I turned and smirked

"Well.. you coming?"

Hope you enjoyed! PLEASE REVIEW! Bye now.


	5. Chapter 5

Eli and I were at our special bench... though it technically wasn't special yet. I was drinking my coffee and Eli opened his mouth and I knew what he said next

"Wow. This is a first... skipping school to do work."

"I don't understand how you got an A and I got a C."

"Simple I'm..."

"No you're not."

"Not what."

"You're not dating Mrs. Dawes."

"How do you do that? Say what I'm about to say before I say it. Its creepy."

"Guess we just have the same sense of humor. I probably would have said the same thing if the roles had been reversed." I lied, I wouldn't have said that... but then again... Eli didn't know that.

"Oh... well okay then, if you could change one thing in the world... what would it be?"

_That we break up and it causes you to lose what little sanity you had left at this time._

"My parents. They're not exactly getting along right now."

"So write about that."

_No point. It doesn't change anything._

"I can't. It's personal."

"You care too much what people think."

_In the near future you're gonna realize that isn't true.. I kind of yell at you in front of a bunch of people... at Above The Dot..._

"That is not true."

"Oh... yeah. Prove it."

_You asked for it._

"How?"

"Scream. At the top of your lungs."

_If you think I wont do it.. you're wrong._

So I skipped the first scream that was crappy even by my description and stood up dusted my skirt off and screamed I turned to see Eli's shocked face before it turned into a smirk

_God you're so cute._

"Okay. You're turn."

"Yeah... not my style."

I had to fight off a smile and started walking towards him and he ended up against a pole. All the while saying

"No you have to... you have to." laughing as Eli said

"It's not my style.."

He grabbed my wrists and we stopped and stared at each other and I noticed something in his eyes I hadn't noticed in my dream

**Desire.**

He wants to... I want to.. I started to lean in and so did he we were so close to kissing when a thought hit me

_What if this changes the future? What if he doesn't like me after this?_

I pulled away and walked to the bench and sat down and blushed I looked at Eli in time to see him put his hands down to his sides and smirk.

_This is going to be a long time. _

Later I was at my house trying to concentrate on my homework but honestly I was just waiting for the little ping sound signaling Eli had messaged me, as if my thoughts made it happen I got a message

**(1) Eli_Gold23: More public embarrassment tonight?**

** Clare_E15: Is that an invitation?**

** Eli_Gold23: Do you want it to be? **

Then my parents came into the room

"We made these plans months ago."

"You made these plans. Not me."

He then walked out and my mom saw me and got scared. She asked me if I wanted to fill in for my dad and I didn't really want to but I did. Its what I did in my dream... so that's what I'm doing now.

**Clare_E15: Love to hang- but I cant tonight. Rain check?**

**Eli_Gold23: Sure.**

**Eli_Gold23 has signed off.**

I sighed and went to get dressed. I just had to live through the night and then tomorrow I tell Eli what's going on with my parents.

Hope you enjoyed! PLEASE REVIEW! I tried to make this chapter longer... idk. (1) I could not remember their name things... sorry if they are wrong. Bye now.


	6. Chapter 6

I was walking in the hall to my locker, I just couldn't wait until Eli...

"Missed you last night. Was Twilight on T.V?"

"Their getting a divorce!"

"Wait.. stop.. rewind.. and play. Are you sure?"

"Well its not like they have told me... but its pretty much inevitable. They're are fighting so much.. and I'm pretty sure my dad is cheating... Ijust don't know what to do... I'm just.. I gotta go."

I started walking away and he caught my elbow, I turned and looked into his eyes that were filled with pain.. like seeing me in pain made him hurt too.

:I'm sorry."

I smiled a little bit.

"I'll be fine."

I smiled because I knew it was true. Jake and Glen would soon be in my life. I of course am not going to date Jake this time around... as soon as I made that decision there was this shimmering light type thing... later when I tried to describe it the only way I could think how to was a spirit being given life... for just a moment.

"You cant do that."

She had dark shoulder length hair and hazel eyes. She was wearing a lot of black and I was trying to figure out where I had seen her before...

"Cant do what?"

"Change it. You cant change the future. You can change little things.. like what you say in one moment.. but you cant change something that makes an impact in your future. Whether you like it or not dating Jake made an impact."

"Who are you?"

"Julia."

"Julia.. how..."

"You're getting a second chance. For things to not end so badly between you and Eli... I know you love him right now but at the time you where afraid of him... honest to God terrified. You can make it to where it doesn't end as bad or scary.. but it still has to end. And you can make your relationship with Jake not start so fast so Eli doesn't lose it so fast and you can make it end faster than it did the first time... but you still have to date him... and end it. You can not change the future. It could cause a chain reaction... you and Eli may never get together again, you could get cancer sooner, you could die at a young age... like me... their are so many options. You make so many decisions on a daily basis that define your future. The little things like what you say are unimportant... but the big things... you just cant change."

"But.. I cant just date Jake.. I don't like him."

"You did before."

"I liked him at the time."

"No you didn't. You did it to get to Eli and you know it."

I blushed. It was true. Jake knew it at first too. He was just a rebound... God I was a horrible person. I wanted Eli to be jealous.. I wanted him to want me back. Maybe I was just desperate... I don't know.

"See. You know I'm right."

She said with a smirk that mirrored Eli's. And I couldn't help wondering if Eli got it from her or if she got it from Eli.

"He got it from me. He totally copied my smirk."

"How did you..."

"You have a real problem with voicing your thoughts. You don't realize you're saying what's on your mind until its too late."

"Okay... so what did you come here for?"

"You tried to change the future. I got direct orders from the Big Guy that when you realized what was going on that I wouldn't let you change anything big in the future."

"The Big Guy... you mean, like, God?"

"Yeah. That's what I mean. He gave me pretty clear orders."

"Oh yeah. What did he say?"

She smirked and lowered her voice before saying

"Don't let her screw up her future Jules. Let her have fun... but if she goes to change something major that changed her life... stop her."

"Um.. okay."

"Yeah. So... stop trying to change the future. Crazy!"

And I immediately knew what Eli had seem in her when they dated (besides her looks of course. There was no denying she was beautiful.) Her personality was one where she could have a serious conversation and then when it was over she could joke around and make you feel better.

She smiled and then started to shimmer she opened her mouth and I thought she was going to say something smart and clever. What she really said made me think her and Eli might if been related... they were so alike... it was kind of scary.

"Remember... don't screw up your future freak!"

I laughed. God sometimes I wondered about Eli's taste in girls. Julia The Jokester, me The Jesus Lover, Imogen The Freak.

Well that's not exactly how I saw it... but people from the outside of the relationship that's how they saw it.

I was really shocked that just happened. I just talked to Julia. Eli's ex girlfriend. Eli's DEAD ex girlfriend. And I thought to myself... how am I going to hide the fact that I know about Julia form Eli?

PLEASE REVIEW! Bye now.


	7. Chapter 7

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**

**I JUST THOUGHT I WOULD TELL YOU GUYS... JUST BECAUSE JULIA SAID SHE COULDNT CHANGE THINGS... THAT DOEST MEAN CLARE WILL LISTEN...**

**;) HAHA HOPE YOUR ENJOYING THIS!**


	8. Chapter 8

I opened my eyes and I was in the middle of the hallway with Eli looking at me with a look of worry

"What?"

"You stopped walking. You just stopped and rolled your eyes to the back of your head and just stood there... it was weird. Are you okay?"

"Uh... yeah... I just didn't get much sleep last night."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah... yeah Eli I'm fine. I promise."

He seemed to doubt me for a moment but I smiled at him and it seemed to calm him. I was walking with him and Zwe went to class and talked to Adam and when we did I realized that it was the first time I had spoken to him. Man, I needed to get my head out of what's going on with Eli... I had other friends... like Ali... and Drew! Oh I had to make sure she didn't get too involved.. I didn't want her to be hurting AGAIN. (Of course I knew in my head that this would be the first time for Ali... that it would only be me reliving what Ali went through... but its still a best friends thing... and I really didn't feel like going through the sappy love story movies, the ice cream, and the snot crying all over again. I don't think I could handle it a second time around.

Eli and I were walking when Fitz walked up... oh dear Lord. I had completely forgotten about Fitz. I was gonna have to live through Vegas Night AGAIN!?

"Hey Emo boy! Got yourself a little girlfriend now?"

Eli just rolled his eyes and was about to retaliate but I stepped in... I was going to change this. Julia popped up beside me (only I could see her thank God... pretty sure Eli would have broken down...) and silently shook her head no. But I knew she wasn't going to force me to stop. That wasn't the way God worked, he wouldn't allow it. The greatest gift he gives his children is freewill.

"Yeah. I'm his girlfriend. So what?"

I could feel Eli looking at me but I didn't dare look at him, for fear of this not working out the way I wanted.

"What are you doing wasting your time with this freak? You need a real man."

"He is a real man. More real than you. I don't have time for this, come on Eli."

I then grabbed his hand and we started walking off out of the corner of my eye I saw Julia shake her head sadly and disappear. I ignored her, one thing I changed... it couldn't do that much damage... Could it?


	9. Chapter 9

When Eli and I turned the corner he pulled us to a stop and then let go of my hand, he turned towards me with a questioning look.

"What?"

"What was that? You said we were dating."

"Yeah. I didn't want you to fight with Fitz."

"How did you even know we would have fought? Hmm."

"I just had a feeling."

"Well okay."

"So no fighting, Okay."

He shook his head and smirked.

"You just said it because you cant get enough of this."

He said while gesturing at his body and I laughed and replied something like _Oh yeah you know it. _And we laughed and continued walking and every once in a while I saw him looking at me. We were still walking when suddenly Eli grabbed my elbow and turned me towards him and looked in my eyes and then looked at my lips... he began leaning in and I almost forgot that we kissed the first time in about a week... he was leaning in and our foreheads were touching

"I want you Clare... God you have no idea."

His voice was husky and I wanted him too. He leaned in and grabbed my bottom lip in between his teeth and pulled causing a moan to erupt from me, even before we got together Eli somehow knew I loved that.

"But I cant have you yet."

He said and then he pulled away from me completely and started walking not looking back, he just walked out the door and I was alone.

"You changed it."

I turned and Julia was there.

"You made his feelings different. You are lucky it was a good change, it could have made him not like you at all. You cant just change things."

She was annoyed I could tell.

"Look I'm sorry. Okay, but I couldn't just let them fight. I had the power to change it.. so I did."

"You may think that this is a good thing... You and Eli getting together... but every thing comes with a price."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means... look out for Eli... Their may be something a bit off about him."

Then she disappeared and I was left there to think... What the hell does that mean?

Hope you enjoyed! Bye now.


	10. Chapter 10

I was really confused. I mean... something might be a bit off with Eli..? How was I supposed to tell if something was wrong? Back when this was first happening there was ALWAYS something a bit **_off_**with Eli. Always. First with Julia, then with his hoarding, then his passiveness... He was never truly okay... how was I supposed to tell if something was a bit **_off?_**I was so confused and wasn't paying attention to much just staring off into space leaning against my locker. Eli walked up and winked at me and then began to open his locker, everything fell out and he looked shocked with just the perfect amount of embarrassment. As he began to gather everything up I heard him muttering to Julia (What!? I didn't hear that when I was having the dream... guess it makes sense tho.) that it was going to be okay and I just stood there and I whispered

"This isn't supposed to be happening yet..."

He looked at me confused and I just blushed.

"What do you mean this isn't supposed to be happening yet?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You said,,,"

"I didn't say anything Eli... I promise."

I hated lying to him... but there is no way I could easily say

_"So I already know you. Yeah we fall in love in the future... by the way I already know about you dead ex and your hoarding... so yeah we fall in love but then I break up with you... but we get back together then you break up with me... but now we're back together and I'm in the hospital with cancer and this could all just be a weird dream I'm having because of chemo.."_

Yeah.. I don't really know why... but I don't see that going over very well. I sighed and he looked at me again and then continued to clean up his mess and then winked at me and started walking off.

"Confused yet?"

"What do you want Julia?"

"Oh... you know I'm just checking in... seeing how you're dealing with the consequence of your stupid mistake."

"What are you talking about?"

"You wanted you're relationship to go faster with Eli... well hear you go. You're getting it."

"Okay so you just speed everything up? Doesn't seem like much of a punishment.. I mean I get with Eli faster and get to stay with him longer... cause I'm not breaking up with him."

"I was scared you would say that. Grab my hand."

"What? Why?"

"I'm going to show you your future. If you don't break up with Eli the first time he doesn't get help until it's too late.. so I'm going to show you you're future. Grab my hand."

So I grabbed her hand and suddenly you see me in Eli's house but his parents aren't home and I'm running. Running for my life I have blood going down my forehead and it slowly making it's way down to my neck, I'm in a pair of short shorts and a tank top, a white one, and there is a whole in my shirt and blood gushing from a wound that looked like I had been stabbed and then I saw Eli chasing me with a knife in his hand, his pocket knife. I tried to get to the door but he stopped me, so I turned and tried running towards the back door but he blocked my path again so I turned and headed towards the stairs I made it half way up when he grabbed my hair and pulled me back down.

"Why do you keep running form me!? I fucking lov you!"

He screamed while bringing the knife down and... then I was back at school.

"Why did you stop it there?"

"I didn't think you needed to see the rest."

Julia said simply.

"So that's what your future will end up like if you'd ont break up with him and he gets help. Because you know Eli... you know he would never do something like that if he was in his right mind..."

I just nodded and smiled sadly. I had to break up with him.

Hope you enjoyed. Bye now.(:


	11. Chapter 11

After Julia showed me what my future was if I didn't break up with Eli, she gave me a sad look and then disappeared. I was going to skip the rest of the day, but I was stopped by Ali who was having one of her "Drew Fits" meaning she wanted than he did at that moment and she needed someone to vent to, by the time she was done Eli had seen me and I couldn't just skip, he would think I was mad at him. But I really didn't want to stay at school, so I decided to skip with him.

"Hey Eli, you feel like taking off?"

"Um.. sure. Where would we go?"

"Your house.."|

"Cant. My.. uh.. parents are at home."

I knew for a fact that wasn't true, they were at a concert in a New York, they weren't coming back until next week, and even if they were home they wouldn't care. The is CeCe and Bullfrog were talking about, I was trying to figure out what was wrong, why he was lying to me. Then the truth hit me... like a ton of bicks. His room, he hasn't showed me it yet. In fact, he hasn't told me anything yet... so I decided I would take hime somewhere that would bring up bad memories for him... but good for me. He needed to hurry up and tell me.

"Oh okay, that's fine. I know the prefect place."

He nodded and we went out to Morty, I tried not to act too exited, didn't want Eli to think I was a freak... but I really had missed Morty. We started driving and I gave him directions to The Abandoned Church.


	12. Chapter 12

When we got there Eli immediately turned pale and looked around as if... as if he would see someone that would never be there. He was looking for Julia because the last memory he has of this place was sex with her, a week before she died. He then looked at me with confusion, not saying it out loud but thinking "How did you know about this place... how long have you been coming here?" I decided to answer him.

"I used to come here a lot. Me and an.. old friend."

He nodded like he understood, we sat and I saw him eyeing the corner, it was hidden but I knew that behind the wood and stuff it said "Eli & Julia" inside of a heart. He was trying to inconspicuous about it, and I have to admit, if I hadn't known what to look for I wouldn't have known.. but I did know what to look for and I did notice. And yes it hurt. I knew this question would hurt him.. but it had to be done.

"Eli.. is something wrong? You look a little pale." When I asked that he breathed in deep, shook his head like he was trying to shae away the bad thoughts and then turned towards me, and I regretted asking. I really did.

"I'm fine Clare.. wait no I'm not! God I'm so tired of acting like everything is fine all the time! It hurts, God it hurts!" I pretended to be shocked... not too hard, I hadn't expected his little out burst. I asked wat was wrong, he was breathing really shakily and was crying, he turned towards me and began telling me the story. I knew this story already, Eli.. talks in his sleep. Plus he's told me. But I listened as if my life depended on it. When he was done he just sat there crying.. I held him and whispered that everything would be okay. It seemed like hours before he stopped.

"Thank you Clare. You've really helped me today." I smiled and leaned in a little bit, about to kiss him when I remembered I couldn't just do that.. so I pretended that I was going in for a hug and tried not to blush. As we hugged all my memories of us flashed threw my mind and I began to cry, he seemed shocked and didn't know quite what to say, so he just held me. It was then that I decided that I wasn't going to hurt him like I did. Now, I was going to break up with him.. when the time comes, but it wont be over the phone, and definitely not at the hospital. I was going to stay at the hospital with him and help as much as I could, I would date Jake, but when we go to the cabin I wasn't going to forgive him so easily. I would forgive him, just not as soon. I wouldn't be mad at Ali.. no need to fight with her. As I made the decisions I turned my head a little and saw Julia smiling. She obviously didn't have anything wrong with the changes I planned to make. Then I was surrounded by white and I was standing next to Julia.

"You have finally decided to make some good decisions. I don't have to freak out on you about changing big stuff. Good for you." She said while smirking, I rolled my eyes.. her and Eli both could be such a pain in the ass. She smirked wider.

"Oh, why thank you." I was confused at first, then I remembered.. she could practically read my mind..

"Stupid Edward Cullen wannabe." I mumbled under my breath and she laughed, came towards me and kissed me on the cheek. Then she was gone and I opened my eyes and I was on the ground with Eli looking really worried. I sighed again Jules really needs to stop talking to me while I'm with Eli, cant she tell it scares the shit outta him. As I thought that I heard quiet laughter and then the wind.

"What happened?" I asked playing dumb.

"You were crying and then you fainted. I caught you, and then laid you down on the ground. Are you okay? Are you hurt?"

"I'm fine Eli, just having a bad day... take me home please." he nodded and helped me up, he helped me to the car and drove me home.


End file.
